Leadership Management – Identifying true self & false persona !

In my last post about the leadership management, I wrote about the negotiating skills and how we, as humans, try to play for the win/lose situations when we are negotiating for our goals. It was interesting to reflect back on us again, as humans, on what makes us perform this kind of behaviour.

This interesting aspect takes us to inspect ourselves and differentiate between what we really are and what others think of us as i.e., what we project to be.  Essentially, what we project to others is our ‘persona’, and believe me, we show plenty of them within us !

More or less, we in our professional or in the personal life, we portray various kind of personas depending on situations and we do so mostly to get our work done.  Have a look at the following personas and the kind of behaviour that is displayed by the person wearing the persona, it might help you relate back to your own behaviours.

 

Persona
Behaviour seen / bumper sticker !
typical observations
Conscientious Do the right thing … In high risk environments
Supercompetent Here, let me do it … Less risky or wants to show off
Devoted I will always be here for you … Care taker, family man / woman
Drama queen/king You would not believe the day I had … Super excitement in all things that are done
Performer The show must go on … Calling themselves practical thinkers, do not think of effects
Victim Why me ? Passive thinking, resistive nature
Critic I will tell you what is wrong … Wants to do, but points negative things first
Loner By myself … Super performer, normally thinks others do not align with me
Space out Huh… what ? Attitude !
Mr Nice Guy Sure ! Yes ! Wants to be in the right side of things always
Stoic I can take it … Tries to put a brave face but have fear inside
Hostile Out of my way … Puts too much pressure even for simple things
Self-righteous I will never … Man of principles, apparently
Rebel Not me, man ! Will do things in my own way ..
Shy I will wait for my turn … Why should I speak now, I will tell only if asked, even if its important
Chameleon Whatever you say … Flatterer, always says things, but does little

 

facemasksWhile wearing the personas itself is not a bad thing as such and we may need to wear them as the situation demands. However, what we should avoid is to have the persona overtake our actual self and make us believe in what we are not !

In case you are unable to find out what personas you have wore in the past then the following questions, given to us as a part of exercise, may help.

 

– What about specific people make you not connect with them ?

- Kind of people that you easily connect with ?

- What are some of the things that you resist in others?

- What are these things that I resist in myself ?

- Identify 5 examples of where you have demonstrated the same behaviour / action that you resist in others ?

- What are the 3/4 personas I use to,

             a) To be accepted / loved

             b) To get the job done

- When did you make your 1st appearance ?

- What are you most proud of ?

- What are you most afraid of ?

- What do you think will happen to <your name> if you are not in charge ?

- Whenever you take over, what are you always sure of getting from the environment ?

 

Think of the answers for the above questions and hopefully they will help you realize more about yourself.

As I mentioned in my last post about leadership, one of the most important aspect of leadership is to realize yourself and know more about your own behaviours, personas and intents about your own working style. Knowing about the personas help you understand what state of mind you are in and are you your real self or not, thus helps you take proper decisions in every step that may benefit you in the end.

So, try out the answers for the questions above and see what you realize about yourself !

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Leadership management – Are you negotiating to win .. at what cost ?

In my last blog post where I wrote about the Leadership workshop I attended, I mentioned about two games that we played, one in group and other in pairs which effectively explains how the people perceive leadership as ‘GTD’ (get things done) only and the various styles the people apply for the same.

I promised in my last post that I will be writing more on the games and in this, I would attempt to do the same.

 

So before I start mentioning about the game, let me mention the characters in the game as follows,

Project Manager (PM) – Raj played the role of project manager

Team 1 – Myself along with 4 others

Team 2 – Rest of the 5 team members

 

negotiation1 The PM kept the team 2 inside the training room and gave few instructions to them and a goal to achieve. He also took team 1 outside the room and had a discussion and gave us a  goal to achieve as well.

The goal of the team 1 was as follows,

‘Team 1 needs to make the members of Team 2, stand up and walk 3 steps, without writing anything on paper i.e., name or signature’.

The goal of the team 2, that we were NOT made aware, was as follows,

‘Team 2 needs to get signatures of all Team 1 members without walking or standing up from their chairs’.

He gave both the teams time to think out our strategies on how to achieve ‘our’ goals whilst we were unaware of what the other party has to achieve.  We were asked to have 3 plans ready in case the first or second plan to achieve ‘our’ goal does not work out.

 

The plan we made was as follows,

1. We will request the other team to stand up and walk with us

2. We will make the other team to help us in achieving ‘our’ goal

3. We will sing national anthem so people will automatically stand up, at least if not walk towards the pseudo flag.

Obviously the other team would also have made up the plan and we assumed that they will not respond to what we request them.

So, the way the game unfolded was as follows.  We all, part of team 1, went inside the room deciding to execute the plan and saw all the team 2 members sitting on chairs in a U shape, as if waiting for us to attack. All of them had a notebook and a pen in their hands.  It was obvious that they too had made their strategy to achieve their goal.

So, as the time went on, we tried our plan 1, 2 & 3 but nothing worked. Out of the group of 5 each, few of us could take a mid way such as they stand up and walk with us while we sign for them on the paper. So both our goals could be achieved. However, few people from each team stood up to the end to ensure that they achieve their goal without compromise.

The catch of the system was no team will win unless all the members of the other do as per their goal.  Since about 2 people from each team did not manage to achieve the goal, both the teams lost eventually. Thus, none of the team ended up winning.

Now look at few facts that happened through the game that was played.

  • When the goals were explained, they were explained in such a way that the respective teams were told only ‘what’ they need to achieve, not how
  • The teams were given complete freedom of deciding the plans on how to achieve the goals
  • We were given freedom to make our own assumptions to think on how we believe the other team will react
  • Both the teams went on defensive when the first strategy did not work out and started to pull alternative plans to ensure they win
  • Finally it ended in a conflict and none of the teams won

 

negotiationsLets now look at few assumptions and what happened through the minds of teams during the game, as an honest reflection,

  • We, the team 1, when told our goal, assumed that the goal of the other team will definitely be NOT to co-operate
  • We assumed that they will never do what we will ask of them and eventually ended up making plans that hided our intention of goal behind the back of our behaviour (request, national anthem etc.)
  • We did not want to tell them our goal and understand what their goal is. Rather, we were never interested in knowing what their goal was
  • Finally, as a truth, we all believed that the only way for us to win is to ensure the other person loses !

 

So, in a nutshell, the entire negotiating strategy was based on WIN – LOSE pattern.  We made our own assumptions, without making any attempt to understand what could be our common goal be and find out a WIN – WIN formula.  In this case, could have been the fact that team 1 will sign the paper while walking along with team 2 members.

 

Interesting ?

So what are few key learning out of this game ?

What I understood was as follows,

  • Its very easy to make a WIN – LOSE negotiation strategy. You do not need to make any effort to create one !
  • NEVER ever make any assumptions that the other party will NOT co-operate with you
  • Even if you assume (some think of it as being practical, rational), do not make your strategy assuming you win at someone else’s cost
  • Be open to understand the intent and find out what the other party really wants from you
  • Also, be clear on what you can offer to the other party
  • Once understood the core intents, find a midway to ensure that both he teams WIN by co-operating each other, not trying to supersede each other

 

I am sure if you are still reading this by now, you would also have learnt few things out of this.  As usual, I am keen to learn from you so please let me know your views.

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How do you define leadership ?

Last 4 days, I was fortunate to be part of the ‘Leadership Management Workshop’ and I must acknowledge these days have been an exhilarating, self realizing & self discovering experience.

Being in Amdocs, a company that really makes an effort of developing leadership through specialized programmes such as this one, has been of immense value to me over last 6 months as I am able to get into lot of such workshops / trainings to enhance myself.

leadership Coming back to the workshop that was conducted by Raj Mali, who calls him self a corporate mystic, was conducted over a period of 4 days and had several engaging discussions that ultimately led to the group understanding the secrets of successful corporate leadership. 

Its do have lots to write about the experience of last 4 days and I would be genuinely attempting to write few articles on my experience of last 4 days and how I have grasped, understood and learnt few things. This is obviously the first attempt to start a series of the discussions on the topic of ‘Leadership’.

Our training group of 10 was consisted of managers across various competency centres of Amdocs, some of us were new and coming from other organizations and few of them were veterans who are with the company for close to 10 years or so, thus making it one of the more diverse forums and at the same time, an interesting one.

The common pattern of the last 4 days was consistent. More focus was given on group discussions, observations, role plays and games. It was so surprising that the amount multimedia that was involved was very less. More details on the same, with genuine hope, I will be able to post in coming days on my blog.

 

In this article, I want to reflect on the very first topic that we discussed in the programme and that was a simple question,

 

“What do you think leadership means to you?”

 

On the face value of the question, it looks very simple to everyone, however what surprised me and probably others was that when this was thrown at us, we had really take a pause and think, what it really means?

Few interesting answers that came out of the discussion were,

- Leadership is all about getting things done on time within budget & costs

- Leadership means helping your team grow

- Its about people management

- Its about how you handle issues and the pressure cooker situations

- Leadership is how you motivate people to do their jobs

- Leadership is about managing the work and team

- Leadership is controlling the behaviour and emotions of self and influencing in others

- Leadership is all about setting the rules and helping the followers follow them !

and the answer I gave was “Leadership is all about taking risks and making key decisions that help you grow your team”.  

However, after the session is now complete, what I have understood about leadership is as follows,

Leadership is not a science, its an art.

Its an art on how you understand the mindset of individuals as well as groups, connect with people of various styles and patterns and still form a successful team and achieve a common goal of growth & success. However, none of the above is possible, without yourself making a conscious effort to understand yourself, your own emotions and learn to control and channelize them to create positive energy around.

 

Leadership is demonstrated by various people and they have unique style of executing leadership within the group.  Raj, very effectively classifies all the styles into 4 simple categories and had easily explained them through two games, one group and other pair.

I would like to mention about the games in next article, however, till then, I would like to know your view on what you perceive leadership as and if you have to define, how would be defining the same?

Let me know !

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A day at an innovation festival ..

Its been a very very long time for me to write a post on my blog.  Yeah, I admit.  Call me lazy to write on my blog post or think of it as a lack of anything interesting happening around that prompted me to keep off the blog.

innovation Anyhow, today was a good day at work for me. We had the final of Aviskhar-2010, an innovator’s festival. Essentially it was a competition of innovative ideas that can help the business to either get more business, save costs or increase customer satisfaction. In last few months, we did have few rounds of initial discussions and screenings and today’ finally about 14 teams competed with each other for the top 3 prizes.  The set up was far from conventional where people go on dias and present their idea one by one and a panel of judges vote to rate the best idea.  The competition was more of an open competition where each of the competitor were given a stall with two desktops PCs, laptop & a network connection.  You were supposed to create your own marketing material, decorate the stall and entertain the people coming to visit your stall by marketing your own product.  People will come and visit the stall, talk to you about your idea, ask questions and if they are satisfied, will go to the voting booth and vote for their favourite idea. 

It was pretty interesting for me to stand in a stall and talk to hundreds of unknown people, few knowing what you are talking about, some knowing nothing about your idea. Few were veterans in the company, while few were absolutely new joiners. This kind of experience was new to me at work where I had to act as a sales agent and sell the idea to unknown people and get them buy into your concept and make them actually vote for you. 

My innovative ideas was about reducing the overall operational, infrastructure costs of production monitoring systems while keeping the operational efficiencies in tact. We projected to save about 80% savings on infrastructure requirements and about 30% saving on the human efforts. The visitors included almost all kind of employees right from India Head to new joiners, all showing keen interest in hearing what we wanted to say.  Few got convinced and did managed to vote for us.

I had to talk continuously to over 400+ different people about the idea, talking them through understanding the concept and urging them to vote for us. Looks we could convince only 306 of them.

Although, it was sufficient for me to win IIIrd prize at the contest.

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5 things to learn from 6 month olds !

Smile !My son Shrav became 6 months old last in March and has now grown into a very naughty boy.  Just observing him makes me feel a lot better and happier.

Although he is only 6 months, he still has provided me with few valuable lessons in my life.

1. Smile !

Sharv looks at everyone and smiles. He makes everyone’s day and we love him for that !

Explore !2. Explore !

Since he is able to move his hands and roll around, he has started to explore lot of things. Anything that comes under his radar, he grabs and instantly starts exploring it with his touch and taste senses ! While exploring he would show lot of curiosity which I believe is important to learn any new thing in life !!

3. Express !

Expressing emotions and feelings are very important for self health. I mentioned about that in my previous post on this blog. Sharv never stays away from shouting or crying or laughing if he feels like doing so. If he is not getting enough attention, he would shout.  If something is bothering him, he would give the loudest cry in the world and if he is happy, he would keep on smiling and laughing !

Relax ! 4. Fearless !

Although he would never know at this age what fear is and what should be done, not done. He holds no fear in trying new things. There has been couple of instances that he has launched himself off the sofa or the bed while playing with his toys. Yes, he would cry very loud but will do it again :-)

5. Relax !

After bath will be his most relaxing period.  He loves playing with water during his bath and loves to relax after his bath time workout is done. He likes to take enough sleep and does not stretch himself just for the sake of staying awake !

My daughter as well had taught all above to me when she was 6 months ! Pity, I did not have this blog back then.

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