ethics-signStory 1

Teacher to father of a primary class student : Your son today took a pencil from his friend’s pencil box without asking him.

Father to teacher : I am so sorry teacher, I give him everything he needs so I am not sure why he would do it. I would ensure he does not do it again.  I am very sorry!

Father gets home, calls his little son and angrily reacts,

Father to son : This has been the most embarrassing day in my life. Your teacher told me that you took the pencil of your friend from his pencil box, without telling him.  This is disgusting and I am very angry and feeling ashamed my son could do this.

If you wanted, I could have got you a dozen from my workplace!

 

Story 2

Vijay has been an average person in his profession, however wanted to move on from present job for few reasons. He appears for interview of company 1, get selected, accepts the offer to join the company 1.  With no worry of staying in the current company, he starts hunting for a better offer than offer he received from company 1, due to his little knowledge, previous experience and desperate need of hiring company, he soon gets offer 2 from company 2 and soon an offer 3 from company 3.

He is very proud of his own efforts to collect and accept so many offers from different companies and finally tries to resign from his present company.  Of course, despite him having 3 offers with him, first thing he tries is to negotiate better terms with the existing company, just in case he can juice most from them.  Well, the present company is unable to match the offer made by companies outside and decides to let him go.

Still undecided where to join, he sends letter of acceptance to all three companies with the thought that he would decide whom to join later.  He feels its an honor to have options in hand till last date.  So finally on the day of joining, without informing company 1 & company 3 he joins company 2 and starts working.

He is proud of his own career, the decisions he has made while switching the job and collection of offers he could gather (in this case 3) during the transition.  He is extremely happy telling how he turned down offers from company 1 and company 3 to everyone.

Do the above stories look familiar?

If yes, do you think in our present life ‘little bit cheating’ is now part of ethics and corporates are warming up to this fact?

Do let me know.

Note – by the way the name ‘Vijay’ was the most familiar name I could remember. No pun intended towards any specific person.

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Few thoughts on work-life balance

On November 27, 2011, in Career thoughts, by Swapnil
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home-and-work-life-balanceNow that I am not actively working for any corporate, I believe I am more qualified to talk about achieving work-life balance in the profession. Of course, without goes saying that I would be doing so hoping not to offend any of my past employers.

Its only been little over a week since I left my job and trying to find my feet independently, but this period has enabled me to retrospect and find out how my journey in the corporate world had been for past over a decade of years. Few thoughts that came to my mind with regards to balancing the work-life in professional world, I am attempting to put here.

 

Are you aware of your priorities?

Most of us are driven by tasks and work priorities. We always feel and give priority to what is being told to us by our boss, what the project demands from us and what the team members are expecting from us. I have often seen that people struggle to cope up with the work demands and either stretch to finish the job, struggle to complete and leave it half complete.  May be most of the times all we end up is a day that somehow has finished but, without giving us a bit of satisfaction that we achieved what we set out to achieve.

Stunningly, when I spoke with quite a few people and found what makes them struggle, I found a simple lack of understanding of Urgent vs. Important prioritization and acknowledging them back to the source.  Often this leads to confusion and frustration in situations where the project demands you to pay attention to a critical problem and your boss (or super boss) expects you to complete a task urgently.  Its important that we understand the priorities the role demands from us and act accordingly.

The understanding and acknowledgement of priorities should not only be limited to workplace tasks. It needs to come out of your overall life and what you have set out to work for.  If your family is your priority, make an attempt and an effort to make them most important in your life so that you can plan your work accordingly.

 

Acknowledge the choices, make them or someone else will make it for you

Every situation, however difficult comes with multiple solution and choices that sometimes we lack to see. Often the choices are easy (possibly leading to more issues) and difficult (better in long term) and the history of choices you have made defines your personality.  The choices you have made creates an expectation baseline for you and the perception then becomes difficult to break. 

Typical example is onshore and offshore communication and task allocation where its easy (and sometimes encouraged) by offshore management to simply follow and not argue onshore for aspects that are incorrect. It then becomes a practice, expectation and baseline that is difficult to break. 

Unless YOU choose to be on the right side of choices (and its often difficult), things can not change and you often ending up suffering either by being pushed to corner for your work, experiencing forced decisions and sometimes frustrations.

 

work-life-balance21Corporates are built by nature to squeeze the most out of you

Believe it or not, all the corporates by nature are built to squeeze most out of you.

All the so called people oriented policies are supposed to support you work more in office. Overtime, compensatory off, paid leaves, crèche-at-work are all the facilities to ensure that you spend more and more time in office and give your life for it. 

Very few corporates have rules that prevent you from turning up to office or thinking about work post your work hours.  In fact, most of them reward you for working extra (so called hard work) by promising to pay more, give incentives etc.  Few interesting words that we feel are important and on which our appraisals have been based are,  ‘initiatives’, ‘innovative ideas’, ‘going out of way to support’ inherently means that you are expected to work more to comply the ‘standard’ in your office.

 

Be aware of the trap, understand the priorities, acknowledge and make the choices and you can save yourselves from burning out of work.   Its easy to get caught in the habit of ‘I know it, let me do myself’. Remember, if you do it, you are taking away the right of someone else’s learning it today and in process making it difficult to get rid of it next time it comes.

Be smart, balance life and work. 

Believe me, I know now, its important!

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5 things to learn from a 5 year old !

On July 12, 2010, in Life thoughts, by Swapnil
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13th July 2010 is a very special day for us.  After all, my daughter Sanika, turns 5 on that day.

All these 5 years have been a journey of self discovery for me.  Being with Sanika all these years, observing her, teaching her, fighting with her, talking to her, loving her and sometimes scolding her has taught me several lessons in life. 

As she turns 5 today, I would like to share few lessons I have learnt in my life from Sanika which will stay with me for life.

 

sanika4Be inquisitive

Sanika has a curious mind and she always wants to know reasons on what we are doing. She always observes the situation and keeps on asking the questions until she is satisfied, or … I am absolutely irritated with her questions.  Why? is her favourite question. 

I believe asking right questions is a very positive thing one should do in life. Most of the times we assume things and keep quite and assumptions do not often turn true, hence eventually getting into conflicts etc., Sanika teaches me to ask questions about situation and myself until the time I am satisfied.

 

 

 

sanika3 Be unconditionally positive

One of the best part of being a child, is that world always beautiful. Sanika teaches me to be unconditionally positive about everything. 

She has one basic assumption.  “The world is full of good people, until proven otherwise” and her responses based on this assumption make everyone around her happy.

Over a period of time when we grow up, we tend to observe and remember bad experiences far longer than simple good experiences. Thus making us forget this basic life principle. If you think carefully, as we grow up, we tend to make our assumption as “World is full of wicked, bad people, until proven otherwise”. The more we think like this, tougher the life becomes.

 

 

sanu Forgive and patch up !

Yes, it takes guts to forgive and patch up with someone whom you have just fought. Myself and Sanika often get into conflicting situations, resulting into fights and us both not talking to each other for a while. However, more often than not Sanika makes first move to patch up and I appreciate her for that.

As we grow up, our ego grows up too and sometimes it becomes more powerful than what we ourselves are. Thus, preventing us to make a first move in order to resolve the conflict.

Sanika teaches me to be myself in the conflicting situations to avoid further damage to relationships etc.

 

 

SI850717 [1024x768] Explore the world !

Sanika is a brave girl who likes to explore new things in life. Probably it comes from the fact that she has been a huge fan and follower of the cartoon character of Dora the explorer.  She loves the character so much that in her early ages she used to pretend to be Dora, relegating me to carry out the duties of Boots the Monkey !

Often, this bravery has landed us in big troubles. Especially when she ‘escapes’ to explore things in a big shopping mall herself.  The lesson that Sanika gives me here is to keep an open mind to new experiences and situations. She makes her moves / decisions based on the situation as it comes and does now allow her presumptions, assumptions to come in her way to respond in a different way than normal.

 

 

SI852685 Know what you really want, just go for it !

Sanika, at this early age, knows what she wants to do and has developed few passions.  Swimming has been one of the passions that she has developed. She was always fan of water games, however since last few months she has developed a tremendous passion for Swimming and has learnt it within few weeks.  Believe me, I did not support her in the venture as I myself do not know swimming. She persisted and pestered her grand father to teach her swimming and did not leave it until she has learnt it completely herself. 

Her current passion is cycling !

I think it is important lesson for everyone to know what they really want to. Moreover, be fully committed to achieve it in life. Most of the people, I have seen prefer being driven by system or surroundings, however Sanika teaches me to have goals in life and be fully dedicated to achieve it.

 

Indeed, someone has said, its never too late to learn … but in Sanika’s case its equally true that its never too early to teach :-) !

 

Earlier I wrote another blog about how my younger son teaches me important lessons of life.  You may read them here ‘5 things to learn from 6 month olds!’

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Recently, my father, (Prof. R. K. Deshpande) retired from long and distinguished service service as a Botany Lecturer in Science college and on the occasion of his retirement and I had a privilege to be part of his last day at his work and the small facilitation by his department in his honour.

It was a wonderful occasion of honouring a career that spanned over almost 3 decades and with various achievements, it was great to see his colleagues acknowledging his contribution to their career, work and the legacy he has been leaving behind.

His work life has taught few very important lessons especially to me which I would like to remember forever my life and practice the.  

“Problems will always be there, you need to find a solution and move ahead.”

A career spanning over three decades, for sure, would have had its fair share of troubles and problems. However, he had always followed the principle of facing the problems and finding his way out rather than worrying over the problems and their impacts. He is of firm belief that every problem is mitigable and we must strive to solve the problems and ensure they do not arise later.

“Discipline, hard work & foresight are three pillars of success.”

Discipline, hard work & foresight are very important aspects for getting a success in life.  He taught us the fact that all three must go together if you want to achieve greater success in life. If you leave one out, then you are in a danger of not fulfilling your potential.

“Have your own principles, thoughts and be firm with them.”

My father always encouraged us to take our own decisions in life then be it the choice of school. college, subjects or courses or even wife. He had given us a greater freedom of ensuring that we are responsible for making the decisions that affect our life.  He had never enforced his opinion or rule on us which we simply had to abide by. He is a man of principles and has followed them all his life and had never compromised on them and so does he encourages us to do in our respective lives.

You would not believe the fact that although I was a student in the same college he was a lecturer in, he gave me a freedom NOT to choose his subject for my college education and go for other subjects !

“Do something that interests you, apart from your job !”

My dad has been a versatile personality. Although he had been a teaching professional all his life, his multi faceted personality had shades of being an excellent singer, a very good musician, a very capable stage actor and a very social person. He had composed many songs, given a voice to them and had his music shows at quite a few places across Maharashtra. He also had a keen interest in acting and had played various characters in various stage plays and again had toured across various places in Maharashtra.  He still does have a passion for music and arts and that is something amazes me of his personality. 

Hats off to his work in the creative field and I can only wish I could have so many talents in me !

 

Papa, You are a great human being, a humble man and source of inspiration for our family and we all love you !

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How to live before you die?

On February 20, 2010, in Life thoughts, by Swapnil
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Inspiring talk from Steve Jobs (Apple CEO)

 

How to live before you die? – Steve Jobs

While stumbling through the TED talk videos, I came across the following video talk of Steve Jobs (Apple CEO) and I must admit, its nothing short of inspiring.

He talks about three little stories he experienced in his life and how he has came through these experiences and even stronger.

This is really worth watching, so please tune in and watch this !

Cheerio !

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